Professor Layton and Friends
by MysteryMoonbeam
Summary: Professor Layton and co. go on thrilling adventures! Will Luke get a Big Mac? Will Flora listen to Justin Bieber? Will Descole figure out the difference between Smarties and M&Ms? Will Emmy's milkshake bring all the boys to the yard?
1. Friends go to McDonald's

**Holy crap... I'm sorry. I don't know why I wrote this. XD**

**This is what happens when I want to write a Layton fanfic, but have no inspiration for a decent plot and a craving for a burger. Maybe I'll get around to writing a proper PL fanfic sometime, but until then, enjoy this... abomination. X)**

**Note: It's badly written and everyone is OOC... but it's meant to be like that. :P  
****Disclaimer: I don't own Professor Layton. ON WITH THE SHOW! c:**

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Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were crammed in the Laytonmobile. Which stinks because you can only put four characters in the summary and there's five in the Laytonmobile but Luke always comes with Layton anyway so I didn't include him. Puzzle solved.

Anyway Layton was driving and Emmy was in the front passenger seat blasting 'Milkshake' on the radio. Descole was stuck between the two kids in the back and they were all complaining.

"PROFESSAH, DESCOLE KICKED ME!" Luke cried.

"LIAR!" Descole yelled, kicking Luke.

"Professoooooor, this song is boriiiing, put on Justin Biebeeeer," Flora whined.

"MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD," Emmy screeched, "AND THEY'RE LIKE-"

"IF YOU DON'T ALL SHUT UP RIGHT NOW I'M TURNING THIS CAR AROUND!" the professor screamed.

Everyone shut up. Except the radio which was still playing Milkshake.

"Emmy turn off that CRAP," said Layton.

"Yeah Emmy I want Justin Biebeeeer," Flora wailed.

"Nooooo put on Smarties!" said Luke.

"Dammit Luke!" said Descole. "It's Eminem not Smarties!"

"THEY'RE THE SAME THING!"

"SMARTIES ISN'T EVEN A RAPPER!"

"THAT'S BECAUSE SMARTIES COME IN A TUBE NOT A WRAPPER!"

Then Emmy turned up the music again full blast. "MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE-"

"ENOUGH!" Layton shouted. "WE'RE PUTTING ON ONE DIRECTION!"

"NOOOOOOO!" everyone groaned as the professor pulled out a One Direction CD from his secret stash under his hat.

"Professah I'm huuuungry," Luke complained. "Let's go to Pizza Hut."

"But I don't like pizza," said Flora, "let's go to KFC."

Emmy started singing over the horrible music blasting from the radio. "A PIZZA HUT A PIZZA HUT KENTUCKY FRIED CHICKEN AND-"

"We're NOT going to Pizza Hut or KFC!" Layton yelled.

"BUT PROFESSAH I'M DYIIIIING," Luke cried. "YOU'RE STARVING UUUUS."

"YOU LIKE IT YOU LOVE IT YOU KNOW YOU REALLY WANT IT-"

"FOR GOD'S SAKE LAYTON FEED YOUR DAMN KIDS!" Descole screeched.

"ENTICING EXCITING AROMA SO INVITING-"

"PROFESSOOOR!"

"TRUST ME YOU MUST SEE JUST WHAT YOU'RE DOING TO ME-"

"PROFESSAAAH!"

"I THINK OF YOU AND LICK MY LIPS YOU'VE GOT THE TASTE I CAN'T RESIST-"

"LAAAYTOOON!"

"LET'S EAT TO THE BEAT!"

"SHUT UUUUUUUP!" Professor Layton screamed and he slammed his foot on the brakes making everyone lurch forward and Luke and Flora bash their faces on the backs of Layton and Emmy's seats.

"Ooooowwwwwww," Flora and Luke squealed.

The professor rested his head against the steering wheel. But he hit the horn and the Laytonmobile started making a long loud noise. Layton couldn't care less and didn't bother lifting his head.

"PROFESSAH LOOK!" Luke pointed out the window. "LOOK AT THAT SIGN!"

Everyone looked at the sign.

"Oooooh McDonalds!" Flora squealed. "Pleeeeease professor let's go to McDonalds!"

"NO!" Layton yelled. "We are NOT going to Pizza Hut, or KFC, or McDonalds!"

"But-"

"NO MCDONALDS!"

Five minutes later Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were standing in McDonalds.

"Alright, what do you all want to eat?" the professor asked everyone.

"Food," said Flora.

"A MILKSHAKE!" Emmy yelled. "BECAUSE MY MILKSHAKE BRINGS ALL THE-"

"I want a Big Mac professah!" Luke declared. "A big Big Mac!"

"Luke, do you remember what happened last time you ate a Big Mac?"

"No professah," Luke lied.

"You threw up all over the seats of my damn Laytonmobile, that's what. You're having a Happy Meal."

"NOOOOOO I WANT A BIG MAC PROFESSAH!"

"You're having a HAPPY MEAL!"

"PLEEEEEEASE PROFESSAH I WON'T PUKE AGAIN I PROMISE!"

"For crying out loud Layton let the boy have a Big Mac if it shuts him up," said Descole. "And I'll have some chicken nuggets."

"I'VE GOT TWO CHICKEN NUGGETS RIIIIIGHT HERE," said Luke. Everyone stopped talking and stared at him. He then bent over and picked up two fluffy chicken nuggets from the floor.

"Luke put those down they're dirty," Layton scolded.

"I'LL PUT THEM DOWN IF I CAN HAVE A BIG MAC!"

"FINE YOU CAN HAVE A BIG MAC!"

"YAAAAAAAY!"

"Look Professor!" Emmy squealed. "Happy Meals come with TRANSFORMERS FIGURES! HELL YEAH I WANT A TRANSFORMER!"

"Ok, what about you Flora?" the professor asked.

"Food."

"What kind of food?"

"Edible food."

"Be more specific Flora."

"Delicious edible food."

Professor Layton facepalmed. "Fine you can have a cheeseburger."

"But Professoooor I'm lactose intoleraaaant I can't eat cheeeeese."

"FINE YOU CAN HAVE A CHEESEBURGER WITHOUT CHEESE." The professor went to order everyone's food.

"Can I take your order?"

"Yes please I'd like some chicken nuggets, a Big Mac-"

"YAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAY!"

"-a cheeseburger without cheese, a Happy Meal-"

"Don't forget my MILKSHAKE professor!"

"-and a hamburger."

Professor Layton paid for the food and sent the others to find an empty table.

"This table's empty!" Luke yelled.

"But there's only two seats," Flora pointed out.

"Over here Luke!" Emmy called. "There's five seats at this table."

"NOOOOO I WANT TO SIT HERE!"

So Flora, Emmy and Descole sat at the five-seat table while Luke sat all by himself. Eventually the professor joined them carrying a tray full of food.

"PROFESSAH! SIT WITH ME!" Luke cried frantically gesturing to seat opposite him.

"NOOO PROFESSOR SIT HERE!" yelled Emmy pulling out the chair next to her.

Layton looked at Luke, then back at Emmy. He then sat with Emmy and the others so Luke kicked up a fuss.

"NOOOOOO PROFESSAAAAH!"

"Luke don't be silly," said Layton. "Come and sit with the rest of us."

"NOOOOO I WANT TO SIT HERE!"

"FINE SIT OVER THERE!" The professor screamed and he chucked Luke's Big Mac in his face. Splat went the Big Mac.

"YAAAAAAY BIG MAC!"

"Be right back gotta take a CRAP," Emmy announced and she made a mad dash for the bathroom. As soon as she was gone Descole tore open her Happy Meal and grabbed the Transformers figure.

"HELL YEAH OPTIMUS PRIME!"

"DESCOLE PUT THAT BACK THAT'S EMMY'S TRANSFORMER!" Layton ordered and he tried to grab the toy. Optimus Prime went flying through the air and landed in Emmy milkshake(which brought all the boys to the yard) with a plop.

"SMOOTH MOVE LAYTON!"

"Professoooor they put cheese on my cheeseburger without cheese!" Flora wailed.

"Then take the cheese off."

"I CAAAAN'T IT'S ALL MELTED!"

"For crying out loud Flora just eat the- DAMMIT DESCOLE STOP DIPPING YOUR NUGGETS IN EMMY'S MILKSHAKE!"

"Giggity giggity!" said Luke.

Then Emmy came back from the bathroom. "I wouldn't go in the ladies bathroom if I were you guys because I just SET OFF A STINKBOMB IN THERE!"

"Now Emmy that's not very ladylike," said the professor but Emmy didn't hear.

"HOLY SWEET POOPSICLE WHO PUT OPTIMUS PRIME IN MY MILKSHAKE?"

"Layton did it," said Descole. "It was all Layt- FLORA WHAT THE HELL GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY NUGGETS!"

"Giggity giggity!" said Luke.

"But I can't eat this burger because it has cheeeese on it!" Flora whined.

"HOW WILL MY MILKSHAKE BRING ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD WITH OPTIMUS PRIME IN IT?"

Professor Layton reached into Emmy's milkshake and took Optimus Prime out. Emmy gasped.

"HOLY SWEET POOPSICLE YOU'RE A GENIUS PROFESSOR!" Emmy cried and she hugged Layton so hard he thought he heard a rib snap. But it wasn't Layton's rib snapping it was the One Direction CD he kept in his pocket.

"EMMY YOU SNAPPED MY ONE DIRECTION CD!"

"Oops."

"Professaaaaah I finished my Big Mac!" Luke called and he threw the Big Mac box at Layton. "I want a McFlurry now!"

"No you'll throw up again."

"I WANT A MCFLURRY PROFESSAAAAAAH!"

"YOU'LL GET A KICK IN THE CHICKEN NUGGETS IF YOU DON'T SHUT UP!"

"BUT PROFESSAAAAAAAAA-" Luke then threw up Big Mac vomit all over the professor who fell out of his chair and screamed like a girl. All five of them got kicked out of McDonalds and went home.

The end.


	2. Friends go to a Sleepover

**I can't believe I wrote a second one. XD**

**Yes, I could've made them go to Burger King or Pizza Hut or another fast food place, but I thought it would get boring if I kept using fast food places... so this came to mind. Enjoy! :P**

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Once upon a time Professor Layton was sitting in his house reading Twilight when the doorbell went DING DONG. So he went to answer it and standing there was Luke, Emmy, Flora and Descole.

"HIII PROFESSAH!" Luke yelled and he ran inside the professor's house getting mud all over his carpet.

"LUKE WHAT THE HELL YOU GOT MUD ALL OVER MY CARPET!"

"IT'S NOT MUD IT'S DOG CRAP PROFESSAH!"

"HIII PROFESSOR!" Emmy shrieked. "WE'RE HERE FOR THE SLEEEEEEPOVER!"

Everyone dashed inside Layton's house.

"What sleepover?"

"We got your e-mail," said Flora. "You know the one that said 'IM HAVING A SLEEPOVER TONIGHT WE'LL PLAY NAKED TWISTER SO DONT BRING YOUR PYJAMAS!'"

"PROFESSAAAAAAH HEEELP I'M STUCK ON FLAPPY BIRD!"

"I brought my POWERPUFF GIRLS PYJAMAS!" Descole announced. "They match my UNDIES!"

"GET OUT OF MY HOUSE!" Layton ordered. "WE'RE NOT HAVING A DAMN SLEEPOVER!"

"PROFESSOR YOU HAVE A WII!" shouted Emmy and she switched it on and put in Singstar.

"Yaaaaaay SINGSTAR!" Flora squealed and she grabbed a mic. "LET'S SING JUSTIN BIEBER!"

"THAT'S NOT A WII THAT'S A GODDAMN TOASTER!"

"ALL TOASTERS TOAST TOAST PROFESSAH!" said Luke.

"WHEN DO WE GET TO PLAY NAKED TWISTER?" Descole demanded. "I WANT EVERYONE TO SEE MY BIG-"

DING DONG went the doorbell.

"-EYES!"

Luke opened the door and saw Clive in a Pizza Hut uniform.

"CLIIIIIVE YOU WEREN'T INVIIIITED!"

"But I brought PIZZA!"

"NOBODY LIKES YOU CLIVE!" Luke slammed the door and Clive trailed away snivelling. Meanwhile Emmy and Flora were playing Singstar on Professor Layton's toaster.

"IT'S ADVENTURE TIME!" Emmy sang. "COME ON GRAB YOUR FRIENDS!"

"Giggity giggity!" said Luke.

"THAT'S IT EVERYONE IN YOUR PYJAMAS IT'S TIME FOR BED!" Professor Layton shouted.

"I didn't bring my pyjamas!" said Emmy. "Because we're gonna play NAKED TWISTER!"

"NO NAKED TWISTER!"

Five minutes later Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were in their pyjamas.

"Professor do you like my Justin Bieber pyjamas?" asked Flora.

"A true gentleman wears One Direction pyjamas."

"PILLOW FIGHT!" Luke grabbed a pillow and hit Descole in the face.

"MY FACE! MY BEAUTIFUL SEXY FACE!"

"HELL NO THE PROFESSOR IS SEXIER!" Emmy insisted. "HE'S A TRUE GENTLEMENTLEMAN!"

"JUSTIN BIEBER IS SEXY TOO!" Flora screamed.

"Flora if you say that again I'm disowning you," said Layton.

"HEY PROFESSOR!" Emmy called. "PROFESSOR DO YOU KNOW WHAT DAY IT IS TOMORROW?"

"What?"

"IT'S FRIDAY FRIDAY GOTTA GET DOWN ON FRIDAY-"

"Giggity giggity!" said Luke.

"Who wants to see my POWERPUFF GIRLS UNDIES?" Descole screeched holding up the frilly undies for all to see.

"KICKIN' IN THE FRONT SEAT SITTING IN THE BACK SEAT-"

"I'M NOT EVEN WEARING UNDIES!" Luke yelled.

"TOMORROW IS SATURDAY AND SUNDAY COMES AFTERWARDS-"

"Professoooor I found a magazine under your bed and it's full of people playing Naked Twister!" said Flora.

"QUIET!" Professor Layton shouted. Everyone shut up. "It's time for bed."

"NOOO PROFESSAH I'M HUNGRY LET'S ORDER PIZZA!" Luke screamed and he stole Layton's phone and called Pizza Hut. "Hi I'd like to order the biggest pizza you have IN THE SHAPE OF CHUCK NORRIS'S HEAD!"

As soon as Luke put the phone down a pizza went splat on the professor's window from outside. Luke opened the window and saw Clive in a Pizza Hut uniform.

"GO AWAY CLIVE!"

"But-"

"NOBODY LIKES YOU!" Luke slammed the window shut so hard he smashed it.

"LUUUUKE YOU BROKE MY DAMN WINDOW!"

"Professoooor what's Playboy?" asked Flora.

"NOTHING FLORA!"

"JUST TELL HER LAYTON SHE'S OLD ENOUGH TO KNOW," said Descole.

"Ok fine," said the professor. "When a man and a woman love each other very much-"

"PROFESSAH I DROPPED YOUR TOOTHBRUSH DOWN THE TOILET AND SOMEBODY FORGOT TO FLUSH!"

"Oops," said Emmy.

"That reminds me of a puzzle," said the professor.

"THAT REMINDS ME TO TELL YOU NOBODY CARES," said Descole.

"Professoooor what are they doing in this picture?" asked Flora.

"DAMMIT FLORA PUT MY MAGAZINES BACK!"

"PROFESSOR!" Emmy yelled. "OUR PIZZA IS HERE!"

Flying towards Layton's house was a helicopter carrying a giant pizza in the shape of Chuck Norris's head.

"HOLY CRAP IT'S ALIIIIIVE!" Luke cried.

But flying the helicopter was CLIVE IN A SEXY PIZZA HUT UNIFORM!

"HERE'S YOUR DAMN PIZZA!" he shouted and he dropped the pizza on Professor Layton's house. Splat went the house and so the professor had nowhere to live.

The end.

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**Sorry it wasn't as long as the McDonald's one! But I have to admit, I enjoy writing this kind of stuff. X)**

**Sooo... if you like this one and want me to write some more, where do you think the gang should go next? I've got a list of my own ideas a mile long, but I wanna know what you guys want... and if you still want Pizza Hut, so be it! :P**


	3. Friends go to a Fancy Restaurant

**First of all, thanks skimill123 for the fancy restaurant idea! :3**

**I've also started writing a Disneyland one, and one where they all get kidnapped, plus one of my own ideas(not telling what ;D). I don't know which I'll finish first, but I'll have them all ready eventually. X)**

**Enjoy! :P**

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Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were walking somewhere because the Laytonmobile was broken after Luke poured Coke and Mentos into the engine and it went BOOM.

"PROFESSAAAAH MY FEET HUUURT CARRY ME," said Luke and he jumped into the professor's arms.

"NO," said Layton and he dropped Luke and broke his butt.

"OW MY BUTT!" Luke screamed.

"Where are we going professoooor?" Flora asked.

"It's a surprise," said Professor Layton.

"Are we going to Burger King?" asked Descole.

"No."

"LET'S GO TO DUNKIN' DONUTS!" Emmy screeched.

"NO!"

"How about THE KRUSTY KRAB PROFESSAH?"

"THE KRUSTY KRAB DOESN'T EVEN EXIST!"

"WELL IT SHOULD!" Luke started to cry. "I WANT A KRABBY PATTY!"

"SHUT UP WE'RE HERE!"

Everyone looked at the building. It was a fancy French restaurant called Le Pomme de Terre.

"Oooooooooh Le Pomme de Terre!" Flora squealed. "I heard Justin Bieber ate here once-"

"NOBODY CARES," Professor Layton shouted. "Let's go inside and remember everyone BEST BEHAVIOUR."

"SURE THING PROFESSAH!"

So they all went inside. There was a sign that said 'wait to be seated' so they did. Luke got a pen and wrote 'no' underneath it.

"Luke be a gentlementleman," said the professor.

Then Don Paolo(who worked there) walked up to them wearing a waitress outfit and said "This way please."

The five of them were led to a five-seat table. Everyone sat down and Don Paolo gave them each a menu which they started reading.

"PROFESSAH THERE'S NO KRABBY PATTY ON THE MENU!"

"LUKE WE'RE IN A FRENCH RESTAURANT!" said the professor. "It's 'le Krabby Patty'."

"PROFESSOR WHAT'S MILKSHAKE IN FRENCH?" Emmy yelled.

"I CAN'T UNDERSTAND THIS MENU!" Descole screamed.

"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?" Professor Layton snapped. "YOU'RE FRENCH!"

"I'M NOT FRENCH!"

"JEAN IS A FRENCH NAME!"

Luke started flailing his arms. "THE HEAVY IS A SPY PROFESSAH!"

"Professoooor what does 'le cheeseburger' mean?" asked Flora.

"PROFESSOR I HAVE A PUZZLE FOR YOU!" said Emmy.

"WHAT?"

"WHO LIVES IN A PINEAPPLE UNDER THE SEA?"

Then the waiter arrived who turned out to be Clive who doesn't work in Pizza Hut anymore for some reason.

"May I take your order?"

"EN FRANÇAIS!" Layton screeched in a French accent.

"I DON'T SPEAK FRENCH AND CLIVE ISN'T A FRENCH NAME!"

"FINE we'll have escargot because it's cliché and we can't read the menu anyway."

"NOOOO I WANT A KRABBY PATTY!" Luke complained.

"PROFESSOR DO YOU KNOW THE MUFFIN MAN?" asked Emmy.

"I DO! HE'S MY BOYFRIEND!" Flora squealed.

Then there was a ringing sound.

"IT'S THE APOCALYPSE!" Luke screamed.

"That's my phone just a sec," said Flora. "Hello? WHAT? NOOO THE MUFFIN MAN JUST BROKE UP WITH ME!"

"AND THAT PERSON IS YOU!" Professor Layton pointed dramatically at Don Paolo.

"OK YOU GOT ME I'M THE MUFFIN MAN!"

"WOW PROFESSAH HOW DID YOU FIGURE IT OUT?" Luke cried.

"BECAUSE HE LIVES ON DRURY LANE!"

Just then Clive arrived with a plate full of live snails. "Here's your food bon appétit."

"HA I KNEW YOU WERE FRENCH!" said the professor.

"HOLY CRAP THEY'RE SLITHERING UP MY SLEEVES!" Descole shouted. "THIS IS WORSE THAN MY DATE WITH DORA THE EXPLORER!"

"BUT SHE'S A KID!" said Emmy.

"I DIDN'T KNOW!"

"THE SNAILS ARE IN MY HAIR!" Flora squeaked. "PROFESSOR CALL THE GHOSTBUSTERS!"

"WHO YOU GONNA CALL?" Emmy started singing. "GHOSTBUS-"

"SNAIL FIGHT!" Luke yelled and he chucked a snail at the professor.

"IF THERE'S SOMETHING STRANGE IN THE NEIGHBOURHOOD-"

"DO SOMETHING LAYTON!" Descole yelled. "THEY'RE IN MY GODDAMN UNDERPANTS!"

"I AIN'T AFRAID OF NO GHOST!"

"Quiet!" said Professor Layton. Everybody was silent. "Everyone just calm down and- DAMMIT LUKE STOP THROWING SNAILS!"

"THAT'S FOR DROPPING ME ON MY BUTT!"

Then Emmy pulled a gun out of her pocket and started shooting all the snails. "DIE BITCHES!"

"DAMN EMMY YOU'RE BADASS!" said Luke admirably.

"EMMY WHAT THE HELL THAT'S OUR DINNER!" yelled the professor.

"I'M NOT EATING WHAT'S BEEN IN DESCOLE'S KNICKERS!"

"THEY'RE NOT KNICKERS!"

Luke yanked down Descole's trousers to reveal his Hello Kitty underwear. "HA I KNEW IT!"

"DAMMIT LUKE I BET YOU'RE WEARING SPONGEBOB UNDERPANTS!"

"HELL NO I'M GOING COMMANDO DUDE!"

"PROFESSOOOOR CAN WE GET DESSERT?" asked Flora.

"NO DESSERT!"

Just then Clive arrived carrying five crème brûlées.

"OH BOY CRÈME BRÛLÉE!" Luke started shoveling the dessert into his mouth.

"PROFESSOOOOR MY CRÈME BRÛLÉE JUST SPONTANEOUSLY COMBUSTED!" Flora whined.

"HEY!" said Emmy. "MY CRÈME BRÛLÉE LOOKS LIKE INSPECTOR GROSKY'S CHEST HAIR!"

"That's because it IS Inspector Grosky's chest hair!" said Clive who was still standing there for some reason.

"WHAAAAT?" Luke screamed and he spat out his dessert all over the professor.

"LUUUUKE THAT'S NOT WHAT A GENTLEMAN DOES!"

"PROFESSOOOOR THE TABLE IS ON FIRE!" Flora cried.

"HAVE NO FEAR THE MUFFIN MAN IS HERE!" Don Paolo yelled and he started throwing muffins at everyone.

"THE MUFFIN MAN? MY ARCH-NEMESIS!" said Clive and he stole Emmy's gun. "PREPARE TO DIE MUFFIN MAN!"

"NEVEEEEER!" Don Paolo laughed manaically and jumped out the window.

"Wait a seeeec," said Professor Layton. "These muffins are GRENADES! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!"

Everybody in the restaurant screamed like a girl and dashed outside. The restaurant exploded behind the professor making him look totally badass.

The end.


	4. Friends go to a Wedding

**I wonder how many people knew that 'Le Pomme de Terre' just means 'The Potato'... :P  
****I wonder how many people also noticed that I basically paired Flora with Don Paolo with the whole 'muffin man' thing... I'm sorry. XD**

**Speaking of pairings, this ****contains one-sided pure crack (drunk)Emmy x Descole. I don't ship them for real though, and I won't be pairing them in any future chapters/stories/you know. :P**

**Enjoy! :3**

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Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were having a barbecue in the professor's back garden. Professor Layton was wearing one of those aprons that says 'kiss the cook' but nobody had kissed him which made him sad. There was wine and Emmy got drunk.

"Emmy you're drunk," said Professor Layton. "Get in the Laytonmobile I'll take you home."

"I DON'T WANNA GO HOME I WANNA DO MORE STUFF!"

"Giggity giggity!" said Luke.

"Professooooor I want another hot dog," said Flora.

"I'VE GOT A HOT DOG RIIIIIIGHT HERE," said Luke, taking a bite of his hot dog.

Emmy picked up an onion ring and stumbled over to Descole who was sitting in a chair eating a burger.

"DESCOLE MY SWEET POTATO WE'VE BEEN DATING FOR YEARS SO WILL YOU MARRY ME?" said Emmy and she put the onion ring on Descole's finger.

Descole choked on his burger. "WHAT THE HELL NO WAY-"

"YAAAY I JUST KNEW YOU WOULD SAY YES!" Emmy hugged her new fiancé and Professor Layton, Luke and Flora clapped for them.

"When's the big day?" the professor asked.

"HOW ABOUT NOW! PROFOFESSESSER YOU'RE THE BEST MAN, FLORORORA BANANARAMA CAN BE THE BRIDESMAID AND LUKE THE DUKE OF PUKE IS THE RANDOM GUY WHO CARRIES OUR WEDDING RINGS ON A CUSHION!"

"YAAAAAY I'M A RANDOM GUY!" Luke shrieked. "I'M GONNA CELEBRATE BY DANCING TO MACARENA!"

"I don't have a white dress Emmy," said Layton. "Will my bathrobe do?"

"HELL NO I'M GETTING MARRIED IN MY UNDERWEAR!" Emmy took off her yellow coat and kicked off her shoes. One of the shoes hit Descole on the head.

"Ow," said Descole and he fell off his chair.

"OH CRAPARAMA MY DARLING G.I. JOE IS UNCONSCIOUS." Emmy picked up Descole and rocked him back and forth. "ROCK-A-BYE BABY IN THE TREE TOPS-"

"NOOO I DON'T LIKE THAT SONG!" Flora cried. "THE BABY FALLS OUT OF A TREE!"

"HUMPTY DUMPTY DIED PROFESSAH!"

"I've got the wedding music!" said the professor dashing outside with an oversized iPod. 'Highway to Hell' started blaring which Descole would say is fitting music if he wasn't unconscious.

"HOLY POOP SWEETSICLE I LOVE THIS SONG!" Emmy dropped Descole and started doing the Harlem Shake.

"I'm gonna throw flowers!" said Flora and she started picking some flowers.

"NOOOO MY FLOWERS!" Layton screamed.

"I'VE GOT A WEDDING CAKE RIIIIGHT HERE," said Luke pulling a Spongebob cake out of his pocket.

"THAT WASN'T EVEN A DIRTY JOKE," the professor yelled.

"I CAN SING TOO PROFESSAH! HERE COMES THE BRIDE, BIG FAT AND WIDE-"

"I AIN'T FAT!" said Emmy and she roundhouse kicked Luke Chuck Norris style. "THIS IS SPARTAAAAAAA!"

Luke went flying in the air yelling "TEAM ROCKET'S BLASTING OFF AGAAAAIN!"

"YAAAAAAAY NOW IT'S TIME FOR THE WEDDING!" Emmy reached over Professor Layton's garden fence and grabbed a random passer-by who happened to be Don Paolo. "HEY YOU I'M GETTING MARRIED SO YOU GOTTA BE THE MARRIAGE GUY."

Don Paolo burst into tears. "I WAS JUST ON MY WAY TO THE CORNER SHOP FOR BREAD AND MILK!"

"TOO BAD! NOW TWERK IT!"

While Don Paolo and Emmy were twerking Luke finally landed splat in the wedding cake.

"HOLY CRAP PROFESSAH IT WAS AMAZING UP THERE I MET NYAN CAT AND GUESS WHAT KIRK/SPOCK IS REAL I SAW IT WITH MY OWN EYES PROFESSAH!"

Then Descole woke up to see Emmy and Don Paolo twerking. "MY EYES! MY BEAUTIFUL SEXY EYES!"

"Yaaaaay flowers for the happy couple!" Flora yelled and she chucked a rock at Descole's head.

"Ow," said Descole and he fell back onto the grass unconscious again.

"FLORAAA STOP THROWING ROCKS!" Professor Layton demanded.

"But professooooor I ran out of floweeeers!"

"IN SOVIET RUSSIA FLOWERS RAN OUT OF YOU!" said Luke.

"PROFESSOR HELP DON PAOLO IS ESCAPING!" Emmy yelled.

"EVERY MAN FOR HIMSELF!" Don Paolo screamed jumping over the fence. "SEE YA SUCKERS!"

"HURRY PROFESSOR TO THE BATMOBILE!"

"IT'S THE LAYTONMOBI-"

"NANANANANANANANA BATMAAAAN!"

Emmy(who was still drunk and in her underwear) dashed to the Laytonmobile. Professor Layton picked up the unconscious Descole and carried him to the back of the car and Luke and Flora followed.

"THUNDERBIRDS ARE GO!" yelled Emmy and she slammed her foot on the accelerator.

"HERE COMES THE BRIDE," Luke sang, "BIG FAT AND WIDE, WHERE IS THE GROOM? HE'S IN THE DRESSING ROOM, WHY IS HE THERE? BECAUSE HE LOST HIS UNDERWEAR-"

"EMMY DID WE JUST HIT A SPEED BUMP?" Professor Layton screamed.

"I THINK THAT WAS DON PAOLO!" Flora squealed.

"HOLY CRAP STOP THE DAMN CAR EMMY!" the professor screeched.

"NOOOOO WE'RE GOING TO THE MUSHROOM KINGDOM!" Emmy shouted and she started humming the Mario theme tune.

Then Descole woke up to find himself still in Professor Layton's arms. "LAYTON WHY THE HELL AM I-"

"I CAN EXPLAIN!"

Luke started taking photos of them. "AWW YEAH MY OTP!"

"IS MY DARLING FREDDY KRUEGER AWAKE?" Emmy called. "WHERE SHOULD WE GO FOR OUR HONEYMOON SWEETIE?"

"EMMY WATCH OUT FOR THE LAKE!" Flora screamed.

Emmy drove the Laytonmobile into the lake and water started seeping through the doors. Then she climbed into the back of the car and grabbed Descole(by his arm you dirty minded peeps).

"WE'RE READY PROFESSOR!"

"We are gathered here today-"

"SKIP TO THE GOOD PART PROFESSAH!" Luke yelled.

"Do you, Emmy Altava, take Jean Descole to be your husband?"

"HELL YEAH!"

"And do you, Jean Descole, take Emmy Alta-"

"HELL NO!"

"GREAT you may kiss the bride."

"YAAAAAAY!" Flora cheered.

Then the Laytonmobile sank and they probably all drowned.

The end.


	5. Friends go to Pizza Hut

Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were crammed in the Laytonmobile. It was Luke's birthday so they were going to Pizza Hut because they were banned from McDonald's.

"ARE WE THERE YET PROFESSAH?"

"Not yet Luke."

"I WANT A BIG MAC PROFESSAH!"

"You don't get Big Macs at Pizza Hut," said Flora.

"BUT IT'S MY BIRTHDAAAAAAAY!"

Then Emmy started singing like she always does. "WE'RE GOING TO EAT PIZZA!"

"Dammit Emmy!" said Descole. "It's 'Ibiza' not 'eat pizza'!"

"BUT WE'RE NOT GOING TO IBIZA! WE'RE GONNA HAVE A PARTY! IN THE MEDITERRANEAN SEA-"

"PROFESSAH CAN WE GO TO IBIZA?"

"NO! DO YOU WANT ME TO PLAY MY ONE DIRECTION CD AGAIN?"

Everyone shut up.

"Professooor can we play my Justin Bieber CD?" Flora asked.

"NOOO!" Descole screamed. "IF I HAVE TO LISTEN TO 'BABY' ONE MORE TIME I'M JUMPING OUT THIS CAR!"

"FINE WITH ME!" said Luke.

"WE'RE GOING TO EAT PIZZA!"

"EVERYONE SHUT UP WE'RE HERE!" the professor yelled and so they all got out of the Laytonmobile and went into Pizza Hut. "What do you all want to eat AND FLORA DON'T YOU DARE SAY-"

"FOOOOD PROFESSOR!"

"DAMMIT FLORA I'LL KILL YOU!" Professor Layton started choking Flora Homer and Bart Simpson style.

"I WANT A BIG MAC PROFESSAH!"

"I want a pizza," said Emmy. "Because MY PIZZA BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD-"

"LOOK PROFESSAH A SALAD BAR!" said Luke and he attacked the salad bar. "OM NOM NOM!"

Descole tried to pull him away. "Stop it people have to eat tha- OH MY GOD YES THEY HAVE POTATO SALAD!"

"POTATO SALAD?" Emmy cried. "HOLY SWEET POOPSICLE I'M COMING!"

Luke, Emmy and Descole began guzzling all the potato salad while Professor Layton and Flora sat at a table and started reading the menu.

"Can I have extra pepperoni on my pizza professor?" Flora asked.

"Of course you can Flora," the professor replied, happy to have some peace and quiet at last. He started daydreaming, thinking about what it would be like if it were just him and Flora. 'Professor Layton and Flora' would make a great new title. No whining Luke... no singing Emmy... no screaming Desco-

"PROFESSAH WE BROUGHT YOU SOME POTATO SALAD!" Luke screeched and he dumped a bowl of potato salad on the table in front of the professor. So much for that.

"HOLY CRAP!" Emmy cried. "MY POTATO SALAD RAN OUT OF POTATO! IS THAT _POSSIBLE_?"

"I WANT SOME I WANT SOME!" Flora yelled and she grabbed Luke's bowl.

"NOOO PROFESSAAAH HELP!"

"EVERYONE SHUT UP here's the waiter," said the professor.

The waiter arrived who turned out to be Clive who was working at Pizza Hut again for some reason.

"Welcome to Pizza Hut what do you want to eat?" he asked.

"I WANT ONE OF EVERYTHING BECAUSE IT'S MY BIRTHDAY!" Luke yelled.

"Oh in that case you get the Pizza Hut Birthday Special," said Clive. "All of you follow me."

"YAAAAY BIRTHDAY SPECIAL I HOPE IT'S A GIANT MEATBALL!"

"Maybe we get tickets to a JUSTIN BIEBER CONCERT!" Flora squealed.

"Or a MILKSHAKE THAT BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD!" Emmy screeched.

"Or a pair of SCOOBY-DOO SOCKS!" said Descole. Everyone stopped talking and stared at him. "What? It could be."

"This way," said Clive and he led the five of them through a door outside and into the back of a Pizza Hut delivery van.

"Seems legit," said the professor as they all climbed into the van. As soon as they were all inside Clive slammed the door, got into the driver's seat and drove away.

"PROFESSAAAH WHERE ARE WE GOIIING?"

"WE'RE GOING TO IBIZA!"

"WHERE'S MY SCOOBY-DOO SOCKS?"

"Professoooor it's dark in here I'm scared."

"CLIVE!" Professor Layton yelled and he banged his fist on the metal wall. "WHERE ARE YOU TAKING US?"

There was no reply.

"THIS IS WHY NOBODY LIKES YOU CLIVE!" Luke screeched.

"Professoooor have we been kidnapped?" Flora squeaked.

"I TOLD YOU WE SHOULD'VE GONE TO KFC LAYTON!" Descole screamed. "BUT NOOO WE HAD TO GO TO PIZZA HUT-"

"Let's sing a SONG!" Emmy suggested. "THE WHEELS ON THE PIZZA HUT VAN THAT KIDNAPPED US GO ROUND AND RO-"

"NOOO IT'S MY BIRTHDAY SO YOU ALL HAVE TO SING HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!" said Luke.

"How old are you anyway?" asked Descole.

"HOW OLD ARE _YOU_ GRANDPA?"

"THAT'S NONE OF YOUR BUSINESS!"

"ARE YOU OLDER THAN THE PROFESSOR?" Emmy questioned.

"NO!" Descole lied.

"HE'S GOT GREY HAIR!" Luke shrieked.

"THAT'S NOT MY HAIR!"

"HE'S GOT _NO_ HAIR!"

"Professoooor I'm huuungry we didn't get any pizzaaaa," Flora wailed.

"That reminds me of a puzzle."

"ME TOO PROFESSAH! HOW MUCH WOOD COULD A WOODCHUCK CHUCK IF A WOODCHUCK COULD CHUCK WOOD?"

"HOW MUCH PUKE COULD A LUKE TRITON PUKE IF I KICKED HIM IN THE POTATO SALAD?" the professor screamed.

"A LOT PROFESSAH! HOW MANY PICARATS DO I GET?"

"Professoooor I wanna go hooome," Flora sobbed.

"We're gonna have to EAT EACH OTHER!" Emmy yelled.

"WE'LL HAVE TO REPOPULATE THE EARTH!" Luke cried.

"HEY PROFESSOR I'VE GOT ANOTHER PUZZLE FOR YOU!" said Emmy.

"What?"

"WHAT DOES THE FOX SAY?"

"Well, the most commonly heard red fox vocalizations are-"

"WE DON'T GIVE A CRAP LAYTON," said Descole.

"RING DING DING DING-"

"DESCOLE WEARS A WIG PROFESSAH!"

"WA PA PA PA POW-"

"I DO NOT WEAR A WIG YOU LITTLE BRAT!"

"HATEE HATEE HO-"

"Professoooor someone took a dump in the corner!"

"WHAT THE FOX SAY?"

"EVERYBODY SHUT UP!" Professor Layton screamed. Everyone shut up but there were no sounds coming from the van either.

"Professooooor has the van stopped?" asked Flora.

Before Layton could answer Clive yanked open the door. The five of them squinted in the sudden light and clambered out the van onto someone's lawn.

"PROFESSAAAAH WHERE ARE WE?" said Luke.

"This is my house," said Clive. "Come inside I want to show you something."

For some reason they all followed him inside his house instead of running like hell. Clive led them into the dining room and they saw about twenty pizzas on the table and balloons tied to all the chairs and a radio that was playing We Can't Stop.

"What's all this?" said the confused professor.

"I heard the Laytonmobile ran over the muffin man," said Clive, "so I wanted to thank you with a PIZZA PARTY! BON APPÉTIT!"

"YAAAAAAY!" Luke cheered.

Everyone dashed to the table and started stuffing their faces with pizza. They all ate too much and ended up puking cheese and tomato vomit all over Clive's house.

The end.

* * *

**As cute as it sounds, I won't be changing the title/story to 'Professor Layton and Flora', just so you know. :P**

**Thanks to Abitat Eco the Azran for the kidnapping idea! I ended it on a (somewhat) happy note so Clive wouldn't be the 'bad guy' kidnapping people for the heck of it. X)**


	6. Friends go to Disneyland

**Thanks**** to The Mocking J for the Disneyland idea! I had 'amusement park' on my ideas list, but Disneyland is much better. X)**

**Enjoy! c:**

* * *

Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were on a plane flying to Disneyland in Paris because Luke wanted to see Mickey Mouse.

"Professooooor I feel siiiick," Flora complained and she grabbed Descole's hat and puked in it.

"WHAT THE HELL FLORA WHY DIDN'T YOU USE LAYTON'S HAT?"

"Oh ok," said Flora and she grabbed the professor's hat and puked in that too.

Soon the plane landed and everyone got off the plane and on a bus to Disneyland and the five of them sat at the back where there were five seats in a row.

"I WANNA SIT BY THE WINDOW PROFESSAH!" said Luke.

"Luke do you remember what happened last time you sat by the window?"

"I ONLY FELL OUT THE BUS BECAUSE DESCOLE PUSHED ME!"

"YOU WERE LISTENING TO THAT CRAPPY SPONGEBOB FUN SONG FULL BLAST!" Descole yelled.

Emmy started singing. "F IS FOR FRIENDS WHO DO STUFF TOGETHER-"

"Giggity giggity!" said Luke.

"U IS FOR YOU AND MEEEEE, N IS FOR ANYWHERE AT ANYTIME AT ALL-"

"I never realized how dirty that song sounds," said Descole.

"DOWN HERE IN THE DEEP BLUE SEEEEA!"

"EVERYONE QUIET!" Professor Layton yelled. "Flora gets to sit by the window because she's sick."

"THERE'S TWO SEATS BY THE WINDOW PROFESSAH! I WANT THE OTHER ONE!"

"FINE BUT WE'RE NOT COMING BACK FOR YOU IF YOU FALL OUT THE BUS AGAIN!"

"YAAAAAAY!"

So Luke and Flora sat by the windows and the professor sat next to Luke to make sure he didn't fall out the bus.

"MARY HAD A LITTLE LAMB," Emmy screeched, "SHE THOUGHT HIM RATHER SILLY, SHE THREW HIM UP INTO THE AIR AND CAUGHT HIM BY HIS-"

"PROFESSAH I WANT TO MEET MICKEY MOUSE!"

"MICKEY MOUSE DOESN'T EXIST!" Descole yelled.

"YES HE DOOOOES!"

"DESCOLE DON'T SAY THAT HE'S ONLY A LITTLE BOY!" Professor Layton screamed.

"But he DOESN'T exist!"

"Neither does Santa."

"DON'T YOU DARE SAY SANTA DOESN'T EXIST HE'S MY HERO!"

"Justin Bieber is MY hero!" Flora squealed.

"GET A REAL HERO FLORA!" Professor Layton shouted.

"I NEED A HERO!" Emmy sang. "I'M HOLDING OUT FOR A HERO 'TIL THE END OF-"

"I HAVE A BELLY BUTTON PROFESSAH!"

"HE'S GOTTA BE STRONG AND HE'S GOTTA BE-"

"WE'RE HERE BE QUIET!" Professor Layton yelled and they all got off the bus and went into Disneyland. "What shall we do first?"

"MICKEY MOUSE PROFESSAH!"

"NOOO I WANT TO GO ON A ROLLERCOASTER!" said Emmy.

"Professooor I want to go on the spinning teacups," said Flora.

"Me too Flora," said the professor. "We'll go on the teacups while Luke, Emmy and Descole go on the rollercoaster."

"WHAT? WHY ME?" Descole complained.

"BECAUSE A TRUE GENTLEMAN RIDES THE TEACUPS!" And with that Professor Layton and Flora left for the spinning teacups.

"COME OOOON DESCOLE!" said Emmy and she grabbed his arm and dragged him towards the biggest fastest highest loopiest rollercoaster in Disneyland.

"MAYBE WE'LL SEE MICKEY MOUSE FROM THE TOP OF THE RIDE!" Luke shrieked.

"I WONDER WHAT HAPPENS WHEN WE REACH 88 MILES PER HOUR?"

"I COULD PUKE JUST LOOKING AT IT!"

Meanwhile on the teacups...

"WHEEEEEE THIS IS FUN PROFESSOR!" Flora squealed.

"I BET LUKE'S THROWING UP ALL OVER EMMY AND DESCOLE RIGHT NOW!" Professor Layton laughed.

Back at the rollercoaster Emmy, Luke and Descole were climbing into the front seats. Just to make things convenient for the story there were three seats in each row so they could all sit together. Luke insisted on sitting in the middle.

"Goodbye cruel world," said Descole as the ride started.

"LOOK AT HOW HIGH WE ARE!" Luke cried and it wasn't long before they reached the top of the first drop.

"I CAN'T LOOK!" Emmy screeched excitedly.

"LOOK EMMY LOOK!"

Emmy uncovered her eyes. "HOLY SWEET POOPSIC-" was all she managed to say before the rollercoaster went over the drop and everyone on the ride screamed like a girl.

"MY FEATHER BOA FELL OFF!"

"MY HAT FELL OFF!"

"MY UNDERPANTS FELL OFF!"

"HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE EMMY?" Descole screamed.

"I DON'T KNOW!"

Then they went round a loop and through a corkscrew.

"I'M GONNA PUKE!" Luke laughed.

"DON'T YOU DARE!" Descole shrieked.

"I BELIEVE I CAN FLY!" Emmy sang and she threw her hands into the air. Luke did the same. "I BELIEVE I CAN TOUCH THE SKY!"

Meanwhile Professor Layton and Flora were eating ice cream and heading towards the rollercoaster to meet with the others.

"That ride was the best professor!" Flora giggled.

"And you didn't puke in my hat!" the professor added.

Just as they arrived at the rollercoaster Luke, Emmy and Descole stumbled off the ride.

"LET'S GO AGAIN LET'S GO AGAIN!" Luke and Emmy cheered as Descole threw up in a nearby trash can.

"How was the ride?" Layton asked.

"IT WAS GREAT PROFESSAH BUT I LOST MY HAT-"

"YOU GOT ICE CREAM WITHOUT US?" Emmy yelled.

"Yes because I didn't puke in the professor's hat!" said Flora proudly.

"Luke I found your hat," said Descole and he put the blue hat on Luke's head.

"YAAAAY WHERE WAS IT?"

"In the trash can I just threw up in."

"NOOOOOO-"

"LOOK LUKE IT'S MICKEY MOUSE!" Emmy shouted.

"HOLY CRAP LOOK PROFESSAH IT'S MICKEY MOUSE! TAKE A PHOTO OF ME WITH HIM!" Luke dashed over to the oversized rodent and gave him a big hug.

"IT'S JUST A CREEPY GUY IN A COSTUME!" Descole yelled.

"FOR CRYING OUT LOUD DESCOLE SHUT UP!" Professor Layton screamed and he stomped on Descole's foot.

"OW WHAT THE HELL LAYTON?"

"PROFESSAAAAH COME AND TAKE A PHOTOOO!"

Descole stormed over to Mickey Mouse and tore off his head. But inside the costume was-

"LEON BRONY!" the professor gasped.

"IT'S BRONEV!" said Bronev.

"NOOO MICKEY MOUSE IS A BRONY!" Luke shrieked and he started to cry.

"LOOK WHAT YOU'VE DONE DESCOLE!" the professor shouted. "YOU CRUSHED THE POOR BOY'S DREAMS!"

"YOU CRUSHED _MY_ DREAMS! YOU SAID SANTA ISN'T REAL!"

"HE ISN'T!"

"HE IS HE IS HE_ IS_!" Descole screamed and then he started crying too.

"Professoooor I want to meet Justin Bieber!" Flora wailed and she burst into tears.

"I WANT A MILKSHAAAAKE!" Emmy whined and then she cried too just so she wouldn't be the only one not crying.

"Welp I'll be going now," said Bronev and he sneaked away.

"NOOOO MICKEY MOUSE COME BAAACK!" Luke howled.

"WHY COULDN'T IT BE JUSTIN BIEBER IN THE COSTUME?" Flora snivelled.

"YOU'RE GOING ON SANTA'S NAUGHTY LIST!" Descole bawled.

Professor Layton thought hard. Then a brilliant idea struck him and he shouted above everybody's sobbing: "WHO WANTS COOKIES?"

Everyone immediately stopped crying.

"I WANT COOKIES PROFESSAH!"

"AS LONG AS THEY'RE MILKSHAKE FLAVOUR COOKIES!"

So the professor bought everyone a cookie to shut them up.

"What shall we do now?" Layton asked the others.

"LOOK PROFESSAH A DUNK TANK!" Luke frantically pointed to a dunk tank. Sitting inside the tank was Clive who wasn't at Pizza Hut doing his job for some reason. Just for the sake of fanservice he was in his swimming trunks.

"Any chance we can shove the boy in there?" Descole whispered to the professor.

"I HEARD THAT!"

"I'M GONNA DUNK CLIVE IN THE TANK PROFESSOR!" Emmy declared and she dashed to the front of the queue.

"EMMY DON'T SKIP THE QUEUE THAT'S NOT WHAT A GENTLEMAN DOES!" Professor Layton called.

"But Emmy's a woman," said Flora.

"OR IS SHE?"

Emmy was handed three balls (not like that you dirty minded peeps) and took aim with the first ball. She ended up chucking it behind her and hit Professor Layton right on the nose.

"OW DAMMIT EMMY!"

The second ball was launched right into the air and didn't come back down. Emmy managed to hit the target with the third ball and everyone cheered and poor Clive went splash in the water.

"YAAAAY EMMY!" Luke cheered.

"What's going on?" said Clive from behind them.

"CLIVE WHAT THE HELL?" Emmy screeched. "YOU JUST WENT SPLASH IN THE WATER!"

But then the Clive in the water tore off his face to reveal that he was DON PAOLO!

"IT'S THE MUFFIN MAN!" the real Clive yelled. "RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!"

Everybody screamed like a girl and ran like hell BUT THEN Emmy's second ball came down with a WHOOOSH and hit Don Paolo and knocked him unconscious.

"Emmy you're a hero!" Flora cried and she clapped her hands with glee.

Everyone threw a parade for Emmy to celebrate her victory over the muffin man but Descole was jealous and Professor Layton was still pissed off about his swollen nose so they sabotaged her float and it went boom.

The end.

* * *

**Yes, I included Bronev just to make a brony joke. XD**

**Also thanks to skimill123 for the 'Clive in a dunk tank' idea! Even though it was technically Don Paolo... :P**


	7. Friends go to the Cinema

Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were crammed in the Laytonmobile (as usual) on their way to the cinema because everyone was bored. The only problem was they hadn't decided what movie to watch.

"A true gentleman watches One Direction: This Is Us," said the professor.

"NOOO SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS MOVIE!" Luke shrieked.

"Professoooor I want to see Justin Bieber: Never Say Never," Flora whined.

"Is there a movie about MILKSHAKES?" Emmy asked.

"NO," said Layton.

"THERE SHOULD BE A MOVIE ABOUT ME!" said Descole.

"THERE IS IT'S CALLED THE 40-YEAR-OLD VIRGIN!" said Luke and Descole flipped him off in response.

"DESCOLE THAT'S NOT WHAT A GENTLEMAN DOES!" Professor Layton scolded.

"CAN WE GET POPCORN PROFESSAH?"

"Luke do you remember what happened last time we got popcorn?"

"EMMY FILLED YOUR HAT WITH POPCORN NOT ME!"

"YOU filled his hat," said Emmy, "I filled his shoes with MILKSHAKE!"

"THAT WAS YOU?" the professor cried.

"HELL YEAH!"

"I WANNA WATCH SPONGEBOB PROFESSAH!"

"WE'RE WATCHING ONE DIRECTION!"

"NOOOO SPONGEBOB!"

"JUSTIN BIEBER!"

"MILKSHAKE!"

"I'M NOT A VIRGIN!"

"QUIET WE'RE HERE!" Professor Layton yelled and they all got out the car and went inside.

"PROFESSAH I GOTTA TAKE A CRAP!"

"FINE come with me," said the professor. "Emmy you get the tickets."

So Professor Layton and Luke went to the bathroom and Emmy went to get the tickets.

"Hi I'd like five tickets to see Paranormal Activity," said Emmy.

"But Emmy that's a horror movie," said Flora.

"So is Justin Bieber," Descole muttered.

"WHO WANTS POPCORN?" Emmy yelled and she bought three giant popcorn buckets.

Then Professor Layton and Luke came back.

"Sorry we took so long," said the professor. "Luke got stuck in the bathroom stall."

"I DID NOT!"

"I got the movie tickets!" said Emmy and they went into the theatre and sat down. A trailer for Justin Bieber: Never Say Never started playing.

"MY EYES!" screamed Professor Layton. "THEY BURN!"

"MAKE IT STOP PROFESSAH!"

"YAAAAAAAY!" Flora squealed.

After that a trailer for an adult movie was shown. Professor Layton, Luke and Descole had their eyes glued to the screen the whole time.

"Professooor that looks like your magazine collection," said Flora.

"Yes Flora."

"I wonder if it's in 3D?" said Descole.

"Yes Flora."

Soon all the trailers finished and the movie started. Emmy, Flora and Luke started crunching on popcorn and slurping Coke.

"Strange," said the professor, "this doesn't look like One Di-"

"SHHHHHHH!" Descole hissed. Then a big scary demonic creature popped up on the screen and everybody screamed.

"Emmy what the hell?" Professor Layton whispered. "This isn't suitable for Lu-" Then a big blood-covered knife was shown stabbing someone and everyone (including the professor) shrieked.

"Give me some of that popcorn," Descole demanded and he reached into Luke's popcorn bucket.

"NOOO PROFE-"

"SHHHHHHH!" Emmy hissed.

About twenty minutes into the movie Luke whispered "Has anybody crapped their underpants yet?"

"No," said Flora, "have you?"

"I'm not wearing underpants to crap in!"

"SHHHHHHH!" Emmy hissed again. "IT'S GETTING TO THE GOOD PART!"

A big scary grinning creature flashed on the screen accompanied by a crash of lightning and everybody screamed again.

"Professoooor this is too scary!" Flora squealed and she covered her eyes. Descole stole her popcorn bucket since she wasn't looking.

"No way this is AWESOME," said Luke and he crammed a fistful of popcorn in his big mouth.

"Maybe we should've watched Twilight," said Descole.

"IT'S NOT TWILIGHT IT'S BREAKING DAWN!" said Professor Layton.

"IT'S THE SAME THING!"

"NO IT ISN'T!"

"SHHHHHHHH PROFESSAH!"

Then creepy Psycho-like music started playing and Emmy screamed and her popcorn bucket went flying through the air and landed on the professor's head.

"HOLY CRAP I CAN'T SEE!"

"Oops," said Emmy.

"POPCORN IN MY EYES OW OW OW!"

"THEY'RE TAKING THE HOBBITS TO ISENGARD PROFESSAH!"

"WRONG MOVIE!" said Descole.

"YOU MEAN THIS ISN'T MARY POPPINS?"

Then Emmy started singing. "SUPERCALIFRAGILISTI-

"DON'T EVEN BOTHER EMMY," said Professor Layton.

"Professooooor the big scary monster is going to get me!"

"YOU MEAN DESCOLE?" Luke yelled.

"NO SHE MEANS YOUR MOM!" Descole retorted. Then he felt someone behind him tap his shoulder so he turned around to see Brenda Triton who then slapped Descole in the face.

"OOOOOOWNED!" Luke laughed and high-fived his mother.

"SOMEONE GET THIS DAMN POPCORN BUCKET OFF MY HEAD!" the professor screamed and he stood up and stumbled around aimlessly.

"HEY GET THE DRUNK GUY OUTTA HERE!" a random person called.

"Drunk?" said Layton. "Emmy did you bring wine in here?"

"...Maybe."

"I think they mean you professor," Flora whispered.

"BUT I HAVEN'T BEEN DRUNK SINCE EMMY GAVE ME AN ALCOHOLIC MILKSHAKE AT HER NEW YEAR PARTY!"

"ALGEBRA HAS THE WORD BRA IN IT PROFESSAH!"

"Professoooor there's a bunch of security people coming this way!"

The five of them were kicked out the cinema for being too loud so they went to the shop and got a DVD instead.

The end.

* * *

**I've never actually seen Paranormal Activity, so I know that isn't really what happens in the movie... XD**

**Hope you enjoyed! :P**


	8. Friends go to a Dinner Party

Once upon a time Emmy was sitting in her house watching PewDiePie on YouTube when she decided it would be GREAT to invite all her friends round for dinner. She typed an e-mail to Professor Layton, Luke, Flora and Descole and as soon as she clicked the send button there was a knock at the door so Emmy went to answer it.

"HIIIII EMMY!" Luke screeched and he dashed inside.

"DAMN THOSE E-MAILS ARE FAST!" said Emmy. "I HAVEN'T EVEN MADE DINNER YET!"

"What's for dinner?" came another voice from the door. Flora had arrived and she had the professor with her.

"HI FLORA HI PROFESSOR GLAD YOU COULD MAKE IT!"

"EMMY LET'S HAVE A FRIED EGG FOR DINNER!" said Luke.

"Why?"

"BECAUSE FRIED EGGS ARE AWESOME!"

"NO WE'RE HAVING MILKSHAKE SURPRISE!"

Emmy dashed into the kitchen and opened the fridge and WHAT A SURPRISE it was full of bottles of milkshake. She opened all the bottles and poured them into the biggest pot she could find and turned up the heat as high as it would go. Then she grabbed a cinnamon stick and a piece of broccoli and threw it in the pot.

"NO WAY IN HELL AM I EATING THAT!" came a horrified voice from behind her.

"HI DESCOLE WHEN DID YOU GET HERE?"

"EMMY!" Luke called. "CAN WE PUT A FRIED EGG IN THE MILKSHAKE SURPRISE?"

"NO!" Emmy yelled and she chucked a piece of liquorice into the mix.

"I'll help you Emmy," Professor Layton offered but Emmy hurled a frying pan at his head.

"NOOO YOU'LL POISON THE FOOD!"

The pan bounced off the professor's nose and landed on the floor with a BANG. "DAMMIT EMMY THAT HURT!"

"EMMY YOU HAVE A CAT!" Flora squealed with joy.

"THAT'S MILKSHAKE!"

"YOU NAMED YOUR CAT_ MILKSHAKE_?" said Descole.

"YES AND HE BRINGS ALL THE BOYS TO THE YARD!"

"But Milkshake_ is_ a boy," Flora pointed out.

"GAY CAT!" Luke shrieked.

"You know what this meal needs? A SIDE DISH!" Emmy grabbed a big bowl of salad and dumped it in the stew.

"NO EMMY THE SIDE DISH ISN'T SUPPOSED TO GO INTO THE MAIN DISH!" Professor Layton yelled.

"BECAUSE LETTUCE IS COOL!"

"THAT DIDN'T EVEN MAKE SE- screw this I'm gonna go watch TV."

"FINE FLORA CAN BE MY ASSISTANT CHEF!"

"Yaaaaaay!" Flora cheered and she bounced into the kitchen.

"BUT EMMY FLORA STINKS AT COOKING!" said Luke.

"MAYBE WE'RE IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WHERE FLORA IS A GOURMET CHEF!" Emmy responded.

"MAYBE WE'RE IN AN ALTERNATE UNIVERSE WHERE STACHENSCARFEN IS MARIO!"

"MAYBE WE'RE IN-"

"SHUT THE HELL UP!" screamed Descole who was still standing there for some reason. They didn't shut up so he joined the professor in front of the TV and they watched Ben 10.

"IT'S ALMOST READY!" Emmy screamed excitedly and she added a ball of string and a mushroom to the boiling mixture and then she squeezed a whole bottle of ketchup in there too which turned the stew a horrible sludgy brown colour.

"Emmy that doesn't look edible," said Flora.

"YEAH EMMY IT NEEDS MORE MAYO!" said Luke.

"GREAT IDEA!" Emmy emptied a whole jar of expired mayo into the pot.

Meanwhile Professor Layton and Descole were still watching Ben 10 on TV.

"This is boring," Descole complained. "Layton do you have your Eternal Diva DVD with you?"

"A true gentleman doesn't break the fourth wall."

"But I wanted the watch the part where I-"

"A TRUE GENTLEMENTLEMAN ALSO DOESN'T SPOIL THE MOVIE FOR THOSE WHO HAVEN'T WATCHED IT!"

"BUT BOTH OF US HAVE WATCHED IT!"

"STOP BREAKING THE FOURTH WALL!"

"I'M NOT!"

"PROFESSOOOOR! DESCOLEEE! DINNER IS READY!" Emmy called.

"Crap," said the professor.

Everybody sat around the table and Emmy grabbed a ladle and started pouring the stew into bowls.

"Who wants the first bowl of EMMY'S MILKSHAKE SURPRISE?"

Nobody answered so Emmy gave it to Flora. Before long everyone had a bowl of disgusting froth in front of them.

"Emmy what's in this?" Professor Layton asked.

"That's the SURPRISE!"

"PROFESSAH THERE'S A TURD IN MY BOWL!" Luke screamed.

"IT'S CHOCOLATE!" Emmy yelled.

"IT DOESN'T LOOK LIKE CHOCOLATE!"

"I'M NOT EATING THIS CRAP!" Descole shouted and he flung his bowl across the room.

"NOOOOO!" Emmy wailed. "YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT!"

"Professoooor my milkshake surprise is coming to liiiife!" Flora whined as Emmy punched Descole in the face.

"FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!" Luke chanted.

"NOOOO YOU CAN'T HIT A GIRL!" said Emmy.

"WELL YOU CAN'T HIT A GUY WEARING GLASSES!" said Descole.

"YOU'RE WEARING A STUPID PHANTOM OF THE OPERA MASK NOT GLASSES!"

"STOP FIGHTING!" Professor Layton demanded but they didn't pay attention.

"FINISH HIM!" Luke screeched.

"HADOUKEN!" Emmy cried and she punched Descole again. "SHORYUKEN!"

"FATALITY!" Luke shrieked as Descole went flying into a wall.

"Professoooor my milkshake surprise is moving!" Flora squealed.

"IT'S ALIIIIVE!" Emmy laughed manaically.

"FEEEED MEEEE," the milkshake surprise growled.

"HOLY CRAP RUN!" Professor Layton screamed and everyone dashed outside and got into the Laytonmobile and drove somewhere far away. Meanwhile the milkshake surprise ate all of Emmy's belongings so she came back to an empty house. Clive eventually found the milkshake surprise on the street and so he adopted it and named it Bob.

The end.

* * *

**Gotta love the thought of Emmy in Street Fighter. Or any fighting game, really. X)**

**Also, I hate to say it, but I'm probably gonna finish this after the 10th chapter. :P  
Until then... enjoy! c:**


	9. Friends go Camping

Once upon a time Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were in a forest. They had decided to go camping because nothing sounded better than sleeping in a cold tent on the hard ground and bathing in a lake and crapping in a bush using leaves as toilet paper.

"This looks like a good spot to set up camp," said the professor and he dumped his rucksack on the ground. "Someone help me put up the tent."

"I'LL HELP PROFESSAH!"

"Someone who isn't Luke."

"NOOOOOO-"

"And we need someone to gather wood for a campfire."

"I'll help with the tent professor," said Flora so she and Professor Layton started putting up the tent.

"WHAT CAN I DO PROFESSAH?"

"You can collect firewood with Descole."

"WHAT?" Descole cried. "WHY ME?"

"BECAUSE I WANT SOME GODDAMN PEACE!"

"YAAAAY LET'S GO DESCOLE!" said Luke and he grabbed Descole's hand and dragged him away.

"I'LL NEVER SURVIVE OUT HERE!" Emmy wailed. "NOT WITHOUT MY BELOVED MILKSHAKES!"

"Professoooor where does this pole go?"

"I don't know. Read the instructions."

"BUT IT'S IN FREEEENCH WE SHOULD GET DESCOLE!"

"YOU'RE READING THE WRONG SIDE!" Professor Layton grabbed the sheet of paper and flipped it around. Flora gasped.

"WOW YOU'RE AMAZING PROFESSOR HOW DID YOU DO THAT?"

It wasn't long before the tent was finished and the professor crawled inside to test it BUT SUDDENLY the tent fell down on top of him because Flora didn't hammer the pegs deep enough into the ground.

"Professor are you ok?" asked Flora.

"NO I'M NOT OK GET THIS DAMN THING OFF ME!"

Meanwhile Luke and Descole were still gathering wood.

"LOOK DESCOLE I GOT WOOD!" Luke held up a large stick. "IT'S BIIIIG!"

"MINE'S BIGGER!" Descole held up a larger stick.

"HEY YOU GUYS!" Emmy called. "WE NEED THAT FIREWOOD NOW!"

Luke and Descole headed back to the campsite and dumped their armfuls of sticks in a pile. Professor Layton set the wood alight with his incredible pyrokinetic powers also known as a box of matches. Then the professor reached under his hat and pulled out a big bag of marshmallows.

"I WANT A MARSHMALLOW PROFESSAH!" Luke screamed and he tried to grab the bag.

"LUKE BE CAREFUL OR YOU'LL FALL IN THE FIRE!"

"BUT I WANT A MARSHMALLOOOOOW!"

"THEN SIT DOWN AND SHUT THE HELL UP!"

Luke sat down and shut the hell up. Professor Layton grabbed five muddy sticks and crammed a marshmallow on the end of each one. Then he passed them to everyone.

"Don't get too close to the fire," the professor warned as Descole's cape was set on fire.

"MY CAPE IS ON FIRE!" he shrieked and he ran in circles flailing his arms. "HELP!"

"I TRIED TO WARN YOU BUT YOU DIDN'T LISTEN!"

"I KNOW WHAT TO DO!" said Luke and he unzipped his fly.

"DON'T EVEN THINK ABOUT DOING THAT I'D RATHER BURN!" said Descole.

Then Flora came to the rescue and chucked a full bucket of water over Descole. Descole sat on the grass soaking wet and charred.

"YAAAAAY FLORA!" Emmy cheered.

"Flora where did you get that water?" Layton asked.

"I emptied all our water bottles professor!"

"YOU WASTED OUR WHOLE WATER SUPPLY?"

"PROFESSAH WHEN DO WE GET TO TELL SPOOKY STORIES?" asked Luke.

"NO SPOOKY STORIES!"

Five minutes later Professor Layton, Luke, Flora, Emmy and Descole were sitting around the remains of the campfire telling spooky stories.

"Once upon a time," Luke began, "there lived a SPOOOOKY GHOOOOST."

"WHO YOU GONNA CALL?" Emmy sang. "GHOSTBUSTE-"

"AS I WAS SAYING the SPOOOOKY GHOOOST started attacking people! But then SUPER LUKE MAN SWOOPED IN AND SAVED THE DAY!"

"Yaaaaaay!" Flora started clapping.

"THAT WASN'T SPOOKY!" Professor Layton yelled.

"THEN YOU TELL A BETTER ONE!"

"I WILL! Once upon a time there lived a guy named Justin Bieber. THE END."

"Holy crap that was terrifying I'm going to have nightmares," said Descole.

Snap.

"Did you hear something?" Emmy whispered.

Crunch. Crunch.

"IT'S THE SPOOOOKY GHOOOOST!" Luke shrieked.

Everybody started screaming.

"STAND BACK I'M ONE OF THE THREE MUSKETEERS!" Descole pulled out his sword and charged into the dark woods yelling, "ALL FOR ONE AND ONE FOR ALL!"

There was a brief silence, followed by a cry of, "OW WHAT THE HELL?", and Descole emerged from the forest dragging Clive with him.

"CLIVE WHAT ARE YOU DOING HERE?" said Emmy.

"I was delivering a pizza," Clive explained, "but then SOMEONE attacked me."

"WE THOUGHT YOU WERE A SPOOOOKY GHOOOOST!" Luke wailed.

"Who would you deliver a pizza to in the middle of the woods?" asked the professor.

"Bronev's top secret cabin hideout is over there." Clive pointed. Everyone turned around and saw a large cabin with a huge neon sign on the roof that shined the words 'BRONEV'S TOP SECRET CABIN' all through the forest. Just then the front door opened and out came Bronev.

"YOU KIDS GET OFF MY LAWN!"

"I HAVE YOUR PIZZA OLD MAN!" Clive yelled.

"WHAT DID YOU CALL ME?" Bronev reached into his pocket and pulled out a massive rifle.

"PROFESSOR HE HAS A GUN!" Flora squealed.

"BOB I CHOOSE YOU!" Clive reached into his pocket and pulled out a sticky brown blob.

"FEEEED MEEEE," the blob growled.

"BOB USE SLUDGE BOMB!"

"YOUR TURD IS NO MATCH FOR MR MUFFINS!" Bronev started shooting aimlessly.

"YOU CALL YOUR GUN_ MR MUFFINS_?"

"DON'T JUDGE ME!"

Clive dodged the bullets effortlessly making him look totally badass. "DA NA NA NA CAN'T TOUCH THIS."

"STOP." Bronev slammed his fist on a massive red button on the cabin wall that was labelled 'self-destruct'. "BRONEV TIME."

"HOLY CRAP RUN FOR YOUR LIFE!" Layton yelled.

"YAAAY I LIKE THE PART WHERE WE RUN LIKE HELL!" Luke cheered.

"WHY THE HELL DOES A CABIN NEED A SELF DESTRUCT BUTTON?" said Descole.

Everybody, including Bronev, Clive and Bob the Blob, ran away screaming. The cabin went boom and caused a big forest fire so Bronev got arrested for destroying the environment.

The end.


End file.
